Khalid Sheikh Mohammed: “Also Responsible for Disco”

After this week’s blockbuster news of Khalid Sheikh Mohammed’s confessions to a virtual laundry list of terror crimes additional shocking news concerning the terror mastermind has leaked out of Guantanamo Bay; Mohammed was also the brains behind disco stars the Bee Gees and Donna Summers. Speaking under the condition of anonymity one interrogator said that US interrogators did not initially believe Mohammed’s tales of star making, “I mean in addition to taking responsibility for the sinking of the USS Cole the guy took responsibility for the sinking of the USS Maine and HMS Hood!”

Our source stated that the disco link became believable after further investigation, “it was more than just his I-Tunes library, he had in his possession an early version of the “Stayin’ Alive” lyrics that contained notation in his own handwriting, he had reams of performance contracts listing him as a silent partner and he had a credible reproduction of Studio 54 in his cave, without the personalities of course.” It turns out that Mohammed met Osama “Sammy” Bin Laden at Mohammed’s Beirut disco during the heady late seventies and that he originally served as Bin Laden’s go to guy for entertainment, telling his interrogators that before he came on the scene, “those amateurs could only book Cat Stevens, Peace Train my ass.”


Warning: The above is Satire!

Thanks to the wonderful Dr. Sanity and her Carnival of Insanities for inclusion again this week.